It's weird, I've learned so much about ethics and numerous philosophies, but I still wonder how people can stay so steadfast to a single belief. I don't see how a stoic can keep the same train of thought twenty-four seven. I suppose it may have been easier back then.
Have you ever felt like saying or typing for hours just about how you feel and everything you've ever thought and then felt guilty about it? Thinking about how getting it out might help, but you just feel odd about doing it and you end up not doing anything. It's odd that I feel that way sometimes, because of my beliefs in existentialism and acting. It's always good to get a little bit of cheering even if it confuses the person you're trying to cheer up. Sometimes I feel like getting a few of my friends together and just talking in a comfortable environment and trying to get things out and cheer people up and all, but I know that hardly any of them would want to bother with that.
Right now I'm kinda stuck in my own thoughts. I've been sick for a week now and it feels like it's getting a bit worse. I spent all last night coughing and trying to not vomit up my lungs or something. The past few years I've felt weak and worthless, that's how I've truly felt even though I thought it was just me being strong and learning maturity from my years of getting help and all my experiences.